Googlers - This Woman's Work, Kate Bush
So, the officers don't believe it was an accidental carbon monoxide poisoning. I guess when I told them that Rob is bipolar, and when two of the three officers then remembered they were here two months ago, they are under the assumption that Rob deliberately ran the car in the garage with the door closed. Rob has been so manic, so driven to install this stereo system in his car, at 2:00 a.m. he went out to finish hooking up the 5 speakers. Since this new stereo pulls alot of electricity, he decided to run the car to keep warm. He kept the garage door closed so I wouldn't hear the car or the stereo. All of this I was not aware of until one of his friends came up to my room and knocked on the door at 4:30 a.m. - "Rob's on the kitchen floor, he says he needs you". He was conscious, but he barely made it into the house before collapsing on the floor. I asked him what he felt like, what happened? He says he's real dizzy, he thinks he blacked out. I say, what were you doing? He says he was hooking up the speakers. I say, did you take your bedtime medicine yet? He says, yes he did. I say, maybe it's the Seroquel - I've read that it can make you dizzy if you stand up too quickly. He says, maybe that's it. I say ok, just lay there a minute.
Then I notice the smell. I say Rob, why do you smell like gas? He says, oh the car was running. Oh my god. I say, ok how do you feel now? He's feeling a little better. His friend helps him up and he goes to his room to lay down. Rob says, I think I need to use my aerosol machine. I check out the internet. All signs point to E.R. No help is offered, what am I supposed to do? I call 911. I tell Rob, you're going to the E.R. Rob says, no I just need my machine. I say, Rob you need oxygen, not asthma medicine. It's not your asthma that's causing the problem, it's carbon monoxide.
Police arrive first, ask me what's going on? I explain what Rob was doing. It sounds so ridiculous. Police ask Rob's friend to go out the garage with them. They're quizzing me, they're quizzing the friend. Has Rob been feeling ok, do you think this was deliberate? We're both telling them no, he was fine, he really didn't intend to do this. He was just so manic, so driven to finish this, he was not thinking about anything other than hooking up these damn speakers. Well, they say, you're his mom, and I guess you would know, but we're going to have to consider his history. I say, go ahead that's fine, do what you have to do.
Paramedics have arrived and wheel Rob out to the ambulance. I follow to the ER shortly afterwards. When they let me back there, he's doing ok. He's almost asleep and he's got the oxygen mask on. They draw some blood to check the level of carbon monoxide in his blood. They come back and let me know it's not at a dangerous level anymore, it dissipates pretty rapidly. By now it's been an hour and a half since he came into the house. They want to keep him on the oxygen for a couple of hours before sending him home. Doc tells me not to worry about any brain damage, he doesn't think he got enough to cause a long term problem. Doc says Rob may feel dizzy for awhile, or have a headache. Rob is so tired... he slept the entire time he was in the ER, all the way home, and dropped into bed immediately.
Thank God his friends were here, and still awake too. What the hell am I supposed to do now? I can't trust my 17 year old son to have any common sense. He damn well knows about car exhaust in a closed garage, he just plowed ahead thinking he had time before it would be a problem. Why would you take the Seroquel and then go out to work on the car Rob, you know it makes you very tired and you can't think clearly?!?!
Am I supposed to never sleep so I can watch every thing he does? I feel like I should surgically attach him to my hip so I can guard him, watch him, save him from himself. How do I stop him from killing himself? I'm overwhelmed by the herculean effort it would take to keep him safe. I'm not trying to make this about me, but it's my job to keep him alive, to keep him safe. That's all I'm supposed to do! I don't know how to do it!
I told Rob on the way home, and I'll tell him again when he wakes up - he must be IN THE DAMN HOUSE at midnight, and he is NOT TO LEAVE THE HOUSE once he's in. He is NOT to take his bedtime meds until HE'S READY TO SLEEP! Oh my god. Other than that, I don't know what I'm able to do. I can't lock him in his room. I want to lock him in his room. I should lock him in his room. But, he's stronger than I am, it's not like he would stay there. And that's not a life, either. I can't take away his life to save his life. Sonofabitch. I'm at a loss.
Googlers - This Woman's Work, Kate Bush
So, the officers don't believe it was an accidental carbon monoxide poisoning. I guess when I told them that Rob is bipolar, and when two of the three officers then remembered they were here two months ago, they are under the assumption that Rob deliberately ran the car in the garage with the door closed. Rob has been so manic, so driven to install this stereo system in his car, at 2:00 a.m. he went out to finish hooking up the 5 speakers. Since this new stereo pulls alot of electricity, he decided to run the car to keep warm. He kept the garage door closed so I wouldn't hear the car or the stereo. All of this I was not aware of until one of his friends came up to my room and knocked on the door at 4:30 a.m. - "Rob's on the kitchen floor, he says he needs you". He was conscious, but he barely made it into the house before collapsing on the floor. I asked him what he felt like, what happened? He says he's real dizzy, he thinks he blacked out. I say, what were you doing? He says he was hooking up the speakers. I say, did you take your bedtime medicine yet? He says, yes he did. I say, maybe it's the Seroquel - I've read that it can make you dizzy if you stand up too quickly. He says, maybe that's it. I say ok, just lay there a minute.
Then I notice the smell. I say Rob, why do you smell like gas? He says, oh the car was running. Oh my god. I say, ok how do you feel now? He's feeling a little better. His friend helps him up and he goes to his room to lay down. Rob says, I think I need to use my aerosol machine. I check out the internet. All signs point to E.R. No help is offered, what am I supposed to do? I call 911. I tell Rob, you're going to the E.R. Rob says, no I just need my machine. I say, Rob you need oxygen, not asthma medicine. It's not your asthma that's causing the problem, it's carbon monoxide.
Police arrive first, ask me what's going on? I explain what Rob was doing. It sounds so ridiculous. Police ask Rob's friend to go out the garage with them. They're quizzing me, they're quizzing the friend. Has Rob been feeling ok, do you think this was deliberate? We're both telling them no, he was fine, he really didn't intend to do this. He was just so manic, so driven to finish this, he was not thinking about anything other than hooking up these damn speakers. Well, they say, you're his mom, and I guess you would know, but we're going to have to consider his history. I say, go ahead that's fine, do what you have to do.
Paramedics have arrived and wheel Rob out to the ambulance. I follow to the ER shortly afterwards. When they let me back there, he's doing ok. He's almost asleep and he's got the oxygen mask on. They draw some blood to check the level of carbon monoxide in his blood. They come back and let me know it's not at a dangerous level anymore, it dissipates pretty rapidly. By now it's been an hour and a half since he came into the house. They want to keep him on the oxygen for a couple of hours before sending him home. Doc tells me not to worry about any brain damage, he doesn't think he got enough to cause a long term problem. Doc says Rob may feel dizzy for awhile, or have a headache. Rob is so tired... he slept the entire time he was in the ER, all the way home, and dropped into bed immediately.
Thank God his friends were here, and still awake too. What the hell am I supposed to do now? I can't trust my 17 year old son to have any common sense. He damn well knows about car exhaust in a closed garage, he just plowed ahead thinking he had time before it would be a problem. Why would you take the Seroquel and then go out to work on the car Rob, you know it makes you very tired and you can't think clearly?!?!
Am I supposed to never sleep so I can watch every thing he does? I feel like I should surgically attach him to my hip so I can guard him, watch him, save him from himself. How do I stop him from killing himself? I'm overwhelmed by the herculean effort it would take to keep him safe. I'm not trying to make this about me, but it's my job to keep him alive, to keep him safe. That's all I'm supposed to do! I don't know how to do it!
I told Rob on the way home, and I'll tell him again when he wakes up - he must be IN THE DAMN HOUSE at midnight, and he is NOT TO LEAVE THE HOUSE once he's in. He is NOT to take his bedtime meds until HE'S READY TO SLEEP! Oh my god. Other than that, I don't know what I'm able to do. I can't lock him in his room. I want to lock him in his room. I should lock him in his room. But, he's stronger than I am, it's not like he would stay there. And that's not a life, either. I can't take away his life to save his life. Sonofabitch. I'm at a loss.