Why do some people get addicted while others do not?

Evidence suggests a strong correlation with genetics, a history of addiction in one's family of origin or prior generations ¬ and/or biochemical factors (a chemical reaction in the brain that brings about extraordinary relief and strong cravings). However, the number of exceptions makes us wonder whether there are other factors. There are many who, given their family background, are at extremely high risk, yet who do not become addicts. Conversely, there are those without a history of addiction in their family who do become addicts.

From the standpoint of healthy relationships, or the lack thereof, we can better understand why some people are more predisposed than others and some are less. The key variable is the existence of emotionally nourishing relationships, both in the past and in the present. When one has sources of emotional sustenance, as opposed to being or having been emotionally deprived, there would be less of a need (for relief), the initial high wouldn't hold the same irresistible charm, and there would be no incentive to get involved in yet another non-emotionally sustaining relationship.

Perhaps the simplest explanation is that when the right person discovers the source of relief, whether substance or activity, a dependent relationship is established. The right person is anyone whose level of pre-existing pain is high enough to potentiate an extraordinarily gratifying experience, discovery. Anyone could become addicted at any time, depending on the level of pre-existing pain; and there is no way to tell who is more or less predisposed.

Susceptibility is often a matter of timing as well -- how much one needs relief at any given point in time. Is a person's level of pre-existing pain increased in the face of recent events and stressors. There are certain conditions that make one more susceptible.

Someone whose self-esteem is low to begin with would be more at risk than someone whose self-esteem is relatively high. Someone who is stressed out on the job or is in a deteriorating relationship is obviously more at risk than someone who looks forward to going to work and who is in a stable relationship. People who are struggling with depression, anxiety, or post-traumatic stress are more at risk.

On the other hand, when someone's level of pre-existing pain is fairly well managed or not high, and that person is relatively stable and emotionally fulfilled, we wouldn't expect getting high to become a life-changing event.