I wasn't going to write anything for awhile because I am frustrated with myself and stressed and tired. But I just spent some time reading old posts and it's so helpful to me to read what I was doing and look for patterns that I decided I'd better write about what's happening.
The insomnia continues, as does my sugar addiction. I know that for me it is just like alcohol for an alcoholic. I get a desparate craving for it that is physically painful to get over and one bite brings it all back. Even dried fruit is a major trigger. I have been on and off it many times-- when I have felt best in the past year is when I've been off it-- I've been off it for 6-8 weeks at a time and then something (usually my period) gets me going again. I am very good at talking myself into eating things I shouldn't. It's a ridiculous mind game that I have heard other kinds of addicts go through as well. This morning I ordered a decaf soy latte again and it was definitely caffinated. I felt HORRIBLE-- all jittery and hyper at first, and then I was sweating like crazy and my face was very hot. I feel a little better today. My lungs feel full of cotton-- I am hoping it is due to the last of my cold finally coming out of my lungs and not a new one getting started. If I could just get sufficient rest it would help!
So what to do? I need a major cleanse again-- it's the fastest and easiest way for me to get off sugar. Since I'm not really in a workout routine right now it's not going to get in the way to just do the 5DC. I have to leave out the raisins from the original menu-- those giving me cravings. I might throw in a half cup of beans instead of the raisins-- I haven't decided.
I did not want to do the cleanse this week because I have so much stuff to do, but in a way it will be easier. I have 5 days off coming up: Thursday-Monday I will be home studying for Anatomy and the GRE and doing applications. I NEED to be extremely productive. But, most of my effort can be done lying down on the couch if I need to. Detox requires a lot of extra sleep, so doing while I have time off is a good idea. Since I want to be back on track by March 1st, it seems like the best time to try and do it. So this time off will be a complete cleanse:
Let's call it Spa Week, which includes:
5 day detox diet
Daily light exercise in the form of walking, yoga and or swimming
Clean out cabinets and closets in house-- get organized to promote feeling more calm
Spend as much time as necessary journaling for emotional cleansing
Many hot baths in epsom salts and dry skin brushing for further detoxification
Sleep as much as necessary
In addition before Tuesday I will:
- Finish my applications
- Be ready for the GRE
- Be prepared for Wednesday's A&P exam
- have at least a general memorization level of the muscles I need to have memorized for the following week
I think the combination of "spa week" activities and accomplishment of tasks that are stressing me out will really help to calm me and focus me. Hopefully the detox will speed the rest of my healing from the end of my cold too.
Then, next week I can add some beans back in slowly and begin increasing my workouts gradually. I feel I absolutely must avoid all sugar, dried fruit, flour, wheat and gluten for the next three months. I don't know for sure if I'm allergic to wheat/gluten, but for now it seems best to avoid all triggers. I don't see any real reason to eat grain at all for now. When I get my exercise level higher I may get a bit of starchy vegetable back in there.
When I asked Dr. Fuhrman about my heavy periods, he recommended I "lose 15 pounds in the next two months and see how it is then." I'm not sure if I can lose that much weight in two months-- but I can try. Mostly, I would like to lose 18lbs by June 1st. My sister-in-law (M's sister) is getting married at the end of June-- I'd like to take in that bridesmaid dress and look good in those pictures. Even better, of course, would be to lose the whole 25lbs by then and be done with it, but I don't want to have unrealistic expectations.
So here I go again. Are you tired of reading about me getting on and off sugar over and over again? Because I'm sure tired of doing it.
I wasn't going to write anything for awhile because I am frustrated with myself and stressed and tired. But I just spent some time reading old posts and it's so helpful to me to read what I was doing and look for patterns that I decided I'd better write about what's happening.
The insomnia continues, as does my sugar addiction. I know that for me it is just like alcohol for an alcoholic. I get a desparate craving for it that is physically painful to get over and one bite brings it all back. Even dried fruit is a major trigger. I have been on and off it many times-- when I have felt best in the past year is when I've been off it-- I've been off it for 6-8 weeks at a time and then something (usually my period) gets me going again. I am very good at talking myself into eating things I shouldn't. It's a ridiculous mind game that I have heard other kinds of addicts go through as well. This morning I ordered a decaf soy latte again and it was definitely caffinated. I felt HORRIBLE-- all jittery and hyper at first, and then I was sweating like crazy and my face was very hot. I feel a little better today. My lungs feel full of cotton-- I am hoping it is due to the last of my cold finally coming out of my lungs and not a new one getting started. If I could just get sufficient rest it would help!
So what to do? I need a major cleanse again-- it's the fastest and easiest way for me to get off sugar. Since I'm not really in a workout routine right now it's not going to get in the way to just do the 5DC. I have to leave out the raisins from the original menu-- those giving me cravings. I might throw in a half cup of beans instead of the raisins-- I haven't decided.
I did not want to do the cleanse this week because I have so much stuff to do, but in a way it will be easier. I have 5 days off coming up: Thursday-Monday I will be home studying for Anatomy and the GRE and doing applications. I NEED to be extremely productive. But, most of my effort can be done lying down on the couch if I need to. Detox requires a lot of extra sleep, so doing while I have time off is a good idea. Since I want to be back on track by March 1st, it seems like the best time to try and do it. So this time off will be a complete cleanse:
5 day detox diet
Daily light exercise in the form of walking, yoga and or swimming
Clean out cabinets and closets in house-- get organized to promote feeling more calm
Spend as much time as necessary journaling for emotional cleansing
Many hot baths in epsom salts and dry skin brushing for further detoxification
Sleep as much as necessary
- Finish my applications
- Be ready for the GRE
- Be prepared for Wednesday's A&P exam
- have at least a general memorization level of the muscles I need to have memorized for the following week
Then, next week I can add some beans back in slowly and begin increasing my workouts gradually. I feel I absolutely must avoid all sugar, dried fruit, flour, wheat and gluten for the next three months. I don't know for sure if I'm allergic to wheat/gluten, but for now it seems best to avoid all triggers. I don't see any real reason to eat grain at all for now. When I get my exercise level higher I may get a bit of starchy vegetable back in there.
When I asked Dr. Fuhrman about my heavy periods, he recommended I "lose 15 pounds in the next two months and see how it is then." I'm not sure if I can lose that much weight in two months-- but I can try. Mostly, I would like to lose 18lbs by June 1st. My sister-in-law (M's sister) is getting married at the end of June-- I'd like to take in that bridesmaid dress and look good in those pictures. Even better, of course, would be to lose the whole 25lbs by then and be done with it, but I don't want to have unrealistic expectations.