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It must be a male thing....

Posted Sep 12 2009 10:29pm
I'll give you two hints in the form of pictures:



Have you figured it out yet?

It's pretty obvious that Garrett is looking at the ads from the Sunday paper from last weekend. But what may not be as obvious is that he's.....uh.....well.....there's no proper way to put it, I suppose....he's pooping in his diaper.

Yes, my friends, he is a typical male. He must have something to read while he poops. I didn't realize this "I must have something to read while I poop" thing started so early. I mean, he's only 2.5 years old.

Maybe it's even a generational thing....my grandfather did it, my father did it and Tim does it. Which leads me to my next issue....why do men get the privilege of "relaxing" in the bathroom long enough to read the paper or a magazine? I can't even remember the last time I had even 10 seconds to myself in the bathroom. Yet, men get to lock themselves away in the bathroom for what seems like an eternity, while they catch up on the latest going on in the world....and oh, yes, let's not forget they also get to take care of bodily functions at the same time. Killing two birds at once, I suppose. I guess it's a productive use of time, when you look at it that way. Still, it doesn't make me any less resentful.

The other day Tim came out of the bathroom and asked me, "Did you hear that Bernie Madoff has pancreatic cancer?" I looked up at him from what I was doing (the dishes, of course) and said, "Who? What?" and he repeated himself again.

I laughed and said, "I'm sorry, you must have me confused with someone who actually gets to read the paper and watch the news OR someone who is afforded the LUXURY of being in the bathroom taking care of bodily functions WHILE reading the paper....but I can tell you that the new show on PBS, The Dinosaur Train, starts tomorrow and that there's a new flavor of V-8 Fusion on the market...that's the lastest news in MY world".

He just stared at me for a few seconds and then he said, "Oh, I didn't realize we live in two different worlds".

I said, "Oh, we do.....trust me, we do. In fact, we probably live in two completely different universes".

And, he walked away. I'll give him one thing....he's definitely smart enough to know now that a conversation like this could never possibly end on a good note.



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