Each time you become pregnant you get excited. Even if you have a history of miscarriage, there is still that excitement, even if it is deep down below all the stress and worry. I'm a baby name fanatic, so the most exciting part of pregnancy for me is picking out names.
With both of my most recent pregnancies, my husband and I picked out names almost immediately. Before we knew the first was twins we came up with the name Skylie Saige for a girl and Keegan Dominik for a boy. Then we had the miscarriage.
When I became pregnant again. Those names had lost their appeal, so we went with Irelyn Isabella for a girl and Hunter Jameson for a boy. Then another miscarriage. Although I am not pregnant yet, I still love those names.
Here's the dilemma . . . I'm superstitious. Maybe those names are bad luck. Okay, probably not, but is it in bad taste to name a child the same name you had picked out for a child that didn't make it?
Some people pick out a name and stick with it until they have a pregnancy that comes to term or they adopt. Others chose different names for each pregnancy and refer to the child that didn't come to term by that name, in reality actually naming the fetus. Some never pick out names until the child born healthy, while others wait until the third trimester when the probably of live birth is very high.
Unfortunately, my husband and I don't fall into any of those above categories. So what do we do? Hold off on naming until later into the pregnancy? Not likely. I play with names even when I'm not pregnant. I have since I was about 12 and not at all looking to procreate soon. I play with names now, scouring baby name sites, playing with first and middle combinations, picking out what I think I'll still like when we do have a pregnancy that goes well. We want to have 6 or 7 more children, so having a huge list of names if crucial.
But if we keep on losing names to miscarriage, someday we will probably run out of every name we even remotely like leaving us with names we can't stand as only options when I actually do go into labor.
Maybe by the time I give birth to number 7, so much time will have past that the names Skylie and Keegan won't conjure up such painful memories for us. Maybe a whole batch of new names will appeal to us in our newfound maturity. At point we probably won't have names anymore anyway, we'll just refer to each other my our social security numbers.
From what I've heard, having a name for your fetus helps you bond with it in the womb. An dif miscarriage does happen, that bond will help you deal with the loss better. I don't know. Maybe it's all psychobabble.
I have about a week or so more before I can take a test to see if I'm pregnant yet. If it's positive, I'm sure by the end of April, we'll have names picked out already. We are just those people. Ok, I am that person, I just drag my husband into my obsessiveness, and he complies as he has finally learned it's in his best interest not to cross a pregnant woman.
If you, like me, play with names constantly, I recommend this site . . . http://www.name-a-baby.com. You input all the names you like, plus your last name and it gives you a list of all the possible first and middle name combinations to choose from. Create an account and it will save your lists for you. I love it and spend hours there, pregnant or not.
Next time . . . a topic I touched briefly on in a previous post . . . Infertility and Irrational Anger at Pregnant Women.
Each time you become pregnant you get excited. Even if you have a history of miscarriage, there is still that excitement, even if it is deep down below all the stress and worry. I'm a baby name fanatic, so the most exciting part of pregnancy for me is picking out names.
With both of my most recent pregnancies, my husband and I picked out names almost immediately. Before we knew the first was twins we came up with the name Skylie Saige for a girl and Keegan Dominik for a boy. Then we had the miscarriage.
When I became pregnant again. Those names had lost their appeal, so we went with Irelyn Isabella for a girl and Hunter Jameson for a boy. Then another miscarriage. Although I am not pregnant yet, I still love those names.
Here's the dilemma . . . I'm superstitious. Maybe those names are bad luck. Okay, probably not, but is it in bad taste to name a child the same name you had picked out for a child that didn't make it?
Some people pick out a name and stick with it until they have a pregnancy that comes to term or they adopt. Others chose different names for each pregnancy and refer to the child that didn't come to term by that name, in reality actually naming the fetus. Some never pick out names until the child born healthy, while others wait until the third trimester when the probably of live birth is very high.
Unfortunately, my husband and I don't fall into any of those above categories. So what do we do? Hold off on naming until later into the pregnancy? Not likely. I play with names even when I'm not pregnant. I have since I was about 12 and not at all looking to procreate soon. I play with names now, scouring baby name sites, playing with first and middle combinations, picking out what I think I'll still like when we do have a pregnancy that goes well. We want to have 6 or 7 more children, so having a huge list of names if crucial.
But if we keep on losing names to miscarriage, someday we will probably run out of every name we even remotely like leaving us with names we can't stand as only options when I actually do go into labor.
Maybe by the time I give birth to number 7, so much time will have past that the names Skylie and Keegan won't conjure up such painful memories for us. Maybe a whole batch of new names will appeal to us in our newfound maturity. At point we probably won't have names anymore anyway, we'll just refer to each other my our social security numbers.
From what I've heard, having a name for your fetus helps you bond with it in the womb. An dif miscarriage does happen, that bond will help you deal with the loss better. I don't know. Maybe it's all psychobabble.
I have about a week or so more before I can take a test to see if I'm pregnant yet. If it's positive, I'm sure by the end of April, we'll have names picked out already. We are just those people. Ok, I am that person, I just drag my husband into my obsessiveness, and he complies as he has finally learned it's in his best interest not to cross a pregnant woman.
If you, like me, play with names constantly, I recommend this site . . . http://www.name-a-baby.com. You input all the names you like, plus your last name and it gives you a list of all the possible first and middle name combinations to choose from. Create an account and it will save your lists for you. I love it and spend hours there, pregnant or not.
Next time . . . a topic I touched briefly on in a previous post . . . Infertility and Irrational Anger at Pregnant Women.