Last week I wrote an essay about rediscovering my inner child. As a wife, mom, and employee, it's easy for me to get caught up in my to-do list and my adult responsibilities. I change diapers, cook meals, clean the house, run errands, pack lunches. I tabulate spreadsheets, pay the bills, forecast cashflow, write, and research.
And, while yes, I do set aside time in my day for "me time," often, those activities are often more responsibilities then fun. While I enjoy a good book, most of my reading is "work" reading---personal development books, not juicy novels. While I exercise regularly, I'm often running from necessity---I particularly need the mood lift of a run during this time of year---and not for the pure joy of running itself. While I enjoy cooking, I devote most of my culinary skills to making meals for family, not something delectable for myself.
This reminds me of how I spent my fun money when I first gave myself an allowance. (My husband and I each get a small sum of money every month to spend on ourselves as we see fit---something that has drastically reduced our financial disagreements. ) I was so unfamiliar with the concept of using money for my pleasure that I used my allowance on necessities, practical things like underwear and pajamas. It took me many months before I felt comfortable buying something just because it brought me joy: a scented candle for my office, a body oil from my favorite aromatherapy store, or a pair of earrings.
This past week, my entire family has been sick. While this has its challenges---yesterday three of my children, as well as myself were ill---it's also, surprisingly, been fun. It's been fun because I've set aside my inner taskmaster for a few days, stripping my to do list to the bare necessities. Instead, my children and I have been reading lots of books, watching movies, and generally lounging around. In a word, we've been having fun.
Yes, there is a time and a place for everything. I know that I can't lounge around forever. I know that, at some point, I'll need to finish my tax preparations, scrub the toilet, and cook something besides reheated chicken soup. But I can also find ways to add moments of idleness to my daily life, to honor my inner child, to play, so that I am consciously living---no, celebrating---the beauty in the everyday.
How I can be a kid again---how I can integrate the joy, confidence, and optimism of the little girl I once was with the woman I am today? What about you? What did you love to do as a girl? How can you honor that little girl in your daily life? When was the last time you played?
Anything can become a chore; a drudgery, one more item on a to-do list. This includes self care. The best way to prevent this is to make sure that your self care is truly self care...something that goes beyond the practical, and into the realm of the inspirational. Something done not out of necessity, but out of joy. Something that makes both your grown woman and your inner child smile.
Last week I wrote an essay about rediscovering my inner child. As a wife, mom, and employee, it's easy for me to get caught up in my to-do list and my adult responsibilities. I change diapers, cook meals, clean the house, run errands, pack lunches. I tabulate spreadsheets, pay the bills, forecast cashflow, write, and research.
And, while yes, I do set aside time in my day for "me time," often, those activities are often more responsibilities then fun. While I enjoy a good book, most of my reading is "work" reading---personal development books, not juicy novels. While I exercise regularly, I'm often running from necessity---I particularly need the mood lift of a run during this time of year---and not for the pure joy of running itself. While I enjoy cooking, I devote most of my culinary skills to making meals for family, not something delectable for myself.
This reminds me of how I spent my fun money when I first gave myself an allowance. (My husband and I each get a small sum of money every month to spend on ourselves as we see fit---something that has drastically reduced our financial disagreements. ) I was so unfamiliar with the concept of using money for my pleasure that I used my allowance on necessities, practical things like underwear and pajamas. It took me many months before I felt comfortable buying something just because it brought me joy: a scented candle for my office, a body oil from my favorite aromatherapy store, or a pair of earrings.
This past week, my entire family has been sick. While this has its challenges---yesterday three of my children, as well as myself were ill---it's also, surprisingly, been fun. It's been fun because I've set aside my inner taskmaster for a few days, stripping my to do list to the bare necessities. Instead, my children and I have been reading lots of books, watching movies, and generally lounging around. In a word, we've been having fun.
Yes, there is a time and a place for everything. I know that I can't lounge around forever. I know that, at some point, I'll need to finish my tax preparations, scrub the toilet, and cook something besides reheated chicken soup. But I can also find ways to add moments of idleness to my daily life, to honor my inner child, to play, so that I am consciously living---no, celebrating---the beauty in the everyday.
How I can be a kid again---how I can integrate the joy, confidence, and optimism of the little girl I once was with the woman I am today? What about you? What did you love to do as a girl? How can you honor that little girl in your daily life? When was the last time you played?
Anything can become a chore; a drudgery, one more item on a to-do list. This includes self care. The best way to prevent this is to make sure that your self care is truly self care...something that goes beyond the practical, and into the realm of the inspirational. Something done not out of necessity, but out of joy. Something that makes both your grown woman and your inner child smile.